Life Lessons about: Daddy, I want it Now!

Jesus did not come to judge us for our sins but he looked at our sins as a problem that needed fixed so he came to fix them by looking beyond the fault and seeing the needs and meeting them with His Life.

Tonight We took Selah to target to pick up a birthday present. As we went through the rows of toys, my daughter saw something she has been asking for, for a while. When we explained to her that we realized that she wanted it but we could not get it now but maybe later, she went into a complete puddle of cries and screams of, "I want that"...many emotions flooded our spirits....embarrassment, anger, sadness, empathy, helplessness, panic...I could go on, but no matter what we did we could not quiet her cries. We both got more and more frustrated. We tried reasoning with her, comforting her, hushing her, we tried threats, we tried raising our voice,but all she did was get more upset and more angry as we got more upset and angry. " Lord help me understand how to help her understand. " I prayed...

Tonight the Lord brought this to my attention...I was reminded of me as an adult longing for something I desired for so long (7 yrs) with all my heart, my daughter, and how when I was around other moms having babies I would go home or secretly in my heart cry, "God, I want to be a Mom soooooo bad. " How I longed and had such a deep deep desire to hold our own little baby. I sometimes would have outright temper tantrums and long sessions of weeping over wanting children. Tonight as I was laying here, I saw a picture of Jesus coming into target tonight and picking up my daughter comforting her quietly and walking out of the store and not saying a thing, as she cried and Yelled at the top of her lungs, "I want that! I want that!" When I looked closely I realized it was not her but me. He then spoke to me and said, "When you threw your temper tantrums, this is what I did." This was not a moment to talk or reason, this was a moment to Love and comfort. During those painful moments of crying I did not need explanations of why I was not getting my way, I needed Him and I found Him there holding me and comforting me and quieting me with His Love. Then in the Moments when I was ready to listen He spoke his promises over me then gave me faith to know that our Babies were coming.

This is a hard life lesson for Selah and for Mommy and Daddy...What did I learn, there is a time to love through comforting and there is a time to love through speaking, sometimes they don't happen at the same time. :) Selah's lesson, crying does not always get you what you want, but if you wait and pray, God (and Mom and Dad) see your desire, and has something great in store for you when you are not expecting it. Oh by the way, I told Her the story about Mommy having temper tantrums with God about wanting a Baby...She found it ver amusing but also, I think she understood when I explained that I had to wait and pray and that God gave me Her.

You know what, looking back those years were painful in some aspects but also wonderful! i do not regret that season of waiting. It was in that season that God blessed me with several hours a day that I could just completely get a way with Him with no distractions. it was in those hours upon hours of time that God spoke to me powerfully in ways that I am still receiving from now. Don't get me wrong we still have wonderful conversations, but the time This season is different as I have had to learn how to listen to His quiet voice while also listening to my daughter scream at the top of her lungs, "Mommy", my youngest daughter crying cause she wants nursed, and also changing a stinky diaper, while keeping up with a very messy house...Wow a whole new season...But thank you Jesus for waiting Seasons...Your quietness is so awesome...but Thank you Jesus for reaping seasons...Your Harvest is so wonderful and loud and sometimes Stinky, but beautiful and full of your words of life! I love you Jesus! Thank you for my beautiful Children and wonderful Husband!